is there always a diference?
sometimes i think back on my conquests/past 'loves'/wastes of time/etc., and i cant help but wonder what it was that initially grasped my attention, but more importantly, why it was so difficult to pull away.
did i think it was the ellusive 'love'? yea, probably.
were there promises and statements made that were false? definitely.
did i want to believe it was meant to be? of course, who doesnt??
was i just an idiot? DUH.
now was it because he was the 'man of my dreams'? FUCK no.
if it was one thing i always knew, i knew that i deserved better. but yet, i stuck around. being the typical 'stupid girl' who wants to believe that hes the right one. that he loves me. that he doesnt lie, doesnt cheat. that he isnt a royal piece of shit. smh.
the list can go on and on. trust me, i have been the stupid girl. i OWN that list. ive made every excuse for my [in]significant other to try and make other people believe that he wasnt the asshole i knew he was. to feel less embarassed about my inexplicable feelings for said jerkoff. most of all to try and convince MYSELF that he wasnt what i knew he was. UGH.
when you allow yourself to fall into the trap, it sucks, but eventually you learn to let go. get out. get over him. but what blows my mind/breaks my heart (if thats possible at the same time) is when i see my girls fall so deep and so hard that they dont realize how stupid they are being. and no matter how much you tell them to wake up, they simply arent having it. they go beyond being the 'stupid girl' and shifts closer and closer to the point of no return. this is when said 'stupid girl' starts acting shady, lying on her asshole boytoy to her friends, and essentially chooses the jackass OVER her friends. im talkin you write-off your down ass bitches for some lying, skeezy ass dick. dirty penis OVER ur girls. smh. thats the choice that stupid girls make.
but i digress. the issue at hand is the difference between our emotions, and the REAL thing. problem is, when we're involved with someone before we feel real love, we're blinded. we think that if a dude whispers sweet nothings and treats us alright, that hes the one. when he smiles his gorgeous white smile and looks into our eyes with his hazel ones, we melt. but trust me, those feelings and emotions are misleading.
its like having at a fake louis vuitton bag. on the surface (and from far away) it looks real. it might even feel real at first. but once youve held a real LV, carried it, put your shit in it, stunted with it, you will NEVER want to go back to that fake joint. thats what lusting, needing and wanting is. its that fake louie. its okay for now. but once you get the real louie, REAL LOVE, you realize that that fake shit wasnt even worth the time or effort. it was a waste of your time.
**moral of the long story/metaphor: get rid of that fake shit. its not worth it. and you look stupid for staying with it/him for this long. just sayin'
No comments:
Post a Comment